Thank God we got this off the streets before it hit United States soil. This could have been disastrous in the wrong hands.

An insane woman was attempting smuggle a large amount of contraband into Texas from Mexico this past Thursday. Around 7 am she was questioned by border patrol with the standard question, "Are you carrying any fruits, vegetables, meat or any other type of contraband?" She said no, but during a secondary exam, she admitted she lied.

What on Earth was she trying to taint America with? Salchicha, it sounds like a Mexican meth. It is not though, Salchicha is actually Mexican bologna. Oh my God! 200 pounds of Mexican bologna was almost spread throughout our country. American bologna is already pretty sketchy, I would hate to taste the bologna of our friend's to the south.

She had 23 rolls of this stuff, weighing 227 pounds. Why in the hell would you ever need this much bologna in your life? Even if you were running a deli, you would not need this much bologna. This is why we need Trump's wall. This is the stuff we need to stop people from sneaking into our country.

The bologna incident of 2017 will not be forgotten.

BONUS: Ninja Turtle Robs Wichita Falls Store