Now some people may think a kid who stays up for several days straight playing Xbox and then collapses from dehydration is an idiot but I have to commend him for his dedication to Modern Warfare 3 domination - he just shoulda drank more fluids. I'll tell you what's up with it in today's "News of the WTF?".

In addition to that massive feat, I have the story of a hipster - excuse me - member of the Occupy movement who didn't get quite the result he was looking for when he walked into a bank holding a sign that says "You're Being Robbed" and I make you feel so much better about your gig when I tell you where a couple of guards in a Canadian Jail found an inmate's stash.