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Want stronger, stiffer stems? How about hot, pulsating petals? Okay, we can’t help you with that second one, it just sounded good. Anyways, evidently you can trade in your green thumb for a blue pill.

I hate those “hi-tech heist” kind of movies.  The fact of the matter is that most criminals just aren’t smart enough to pull something like that off, therefore I find the movie unbelievable.  You yourself have probably noticed that there’s more than enough “dumb crook” stories.  We have another one for you after the break.

I guess pretty much everything has to be tested before it’s used by or on the general public, and breathalyzers are evidently no exception.  As with everything though, there are scientific and very none scientific tests.  At the point where you bring in snacks, I think the test kind of leans towards “non-scientific”.

Wanna know what goes through the mind of a hooker? Just ask!

Don’t we all just love it when a crook gets coming to them. If more people just had the opportunity to beat the living sh!t out of crooks, I think there might be less crooks.  I know I’d be less likely to rob a place if I knew I was going to be punched in the face for a half hour.  Details after the jump.

The world owes a debt of gratitude to you organ donors. It is very big of you to make one final sacrifice for the benefit of others.  Sometimes though, accidents happen and your guts just get smooshed.  More after the jump.

Geez this was a hard one to title.  I don’t want you guys to miss out of the ‘big’ surprise in the story.  Let’s just say anytime any lawyer looks bad we’re interested, but this particular case is a little wrong.  More after the jump.

Down here in Texas we hear a lot about bodies found in Mexico. It can be very scary to be that close to that much death.  It turns out, we’re not that close at all, at least compared to Milwaukee.   Heathen has the story next:

Who doesn’t love a lady in uniform? If you are wanted by that lady in uniform, it may actually mean “Wanted” instead of “wanted,” get it? Our suspect today finally got it. Heathen has the story next:

Today it’s no so much about what happened in history, but what Heathen thinks should have have happened in history.  Why should you give a darn about what Heathen thinks?  Because it’s the reason his wife is going to give as an excuse for why she murdered him.  More after the jump.

ANYTHING to make our soldiers lives better is good by me.  Even if that ANYTHING is a somewhat odd sex sleeve.  Maybe we should just wait until you click through for any more details.

You know what they say, “once you go horse you never….uhh, uhh”.  That’s right, “they” don’t say anything about people who love horses.  By “love” I don’t mean respect and cherish either.  I tend to mean more of the physical kind of love.  If you think you can stand more, click through.