Heathen was born to 1 of 2 lesbian mothers, neither of which will take responsibility for him anymore. He went to school. School sucked. Pretty early on he noticed a surging fondness for boobs, breasts, knockers, ta-tas, sweater monkeys, you name it. So when he was old enough to get into the strip clubs, 13 I think, he found himself hanging around the dumpsters because they would also routinely kick him out for “egregiously groping the talent”, whatever that means. After a few years he realized that heaven was a place on earth, and guys could actually get paid to hang around these women by being what is commonly referred to as a sleazeball. Better known as the tittie bar dj. So he got his first job at the Poop-N-Shoot, a topless bar/firing range on the outskirts of an airport someplace where they don’t do background checks. Everything that happened between then and now is anybody’s guess, but I bet if you check enough “official” records, you’ll find something. Anyway, now he’s on the radio and we all have to put up with him. Nice.
Shakira Covers Metallica’s "Nothing Else Matters" [VIDEO]
According to the bodacious Brazilian butt, “I am great fan of bands like Zeppelin, Nirvana or The Cure. I used to be a huge Metallica fan when I was 15, 16 years old. Back then, I used to sing ‘Nothing Else Matters’ all day long. I am still a ve
Old Dudes Kick Ass, Literally [VIDEO]
A couple of Canadian Football old-timers with a long history of hatred started throwing down at an alumni event recently.
The Craziest Fastest Turkeys in the World [VIDEO]
In an effort to promote their “2 Hour Turkey”, Safeway Supermarkets started a funny web ad campaign. The Hoak Farm in Nowheresville USA has spotted, but has yet to catch, what are being called the fastest turkeys on earth. These turkeys haul ass to be specific. If you can
What Gung Ho from GI Joe is Thankful For This Year [VIDEO] [NSFW]
At first I thought this video would be a cheap Robot Chicken knock off. It is. It’s funny though, so here’s Action Figure Therapy. Gung Ho from GI Joe explains all the awesome American things he’s thankful for including Baby Jesus and this sweet-ass mu…
New Third Eye Blind Written for the "Occupy" Movements [AUDIO]
It’s been maybe a lot of years or so since we heard anything from Third Eye Blind. It finally took the “Occupy” wherever movements to bring them out of hiding.
Korn "Sanctuary" [AUDIO]
Here’s Korn’s “Sanctuary,” from their upcoming 10th studio album, “The Path Of Totality.”
3 Questions With Tyler From Theory Of A Deadman [VIDEO]
Roadrunner Records did a “3 Questions With” segment with Tyler from Theory Of A Deadman. Nothing groundbreaking or earth shattering about this interview. In fact it seems kind of plain. Then again every time I’ve interviewed Tyler it was kind of plain. I c…
You Have To Meet "Angry Cobra Cat" [VIDEO]
It seems that cats find a different way to be insane every day. Time to meet “Angry Cobra Cat”. It’s just 2 cats about to get into it when one goes all Mr. Miyagi on with it. This will be the video you watch repeatedly today. Pass it on to yo
Discovery Channel’s Weed Wars is About to be My Favorite Show [VIDEO/AUDIO]
I’m about to have a new favorite show. It’s called “Weed Wars.”
Black Sabbath Are Back. Watch The Press Conference [VIDEO]
Black Sabbath are finally making their return after over 30 years. All 4 original members together to make what we hope is beautiful devil music together. Or maybe they realized how much money was at stake.
Awesome Famous Album Covers Fight to the Death [VIDEO]
Some bad-ass took some of the most iconic album covers of all time and did a whole animated bit with them. They take covers from Def Leppard, AC/DC, Nirvana, Rush, Zeppelin and many many more and string them together through an animated battle to the death.
Baconlube! It’s Real and It’s Awesome and It’s Bacon!
Yes you read it right! There actually is a brand new thing called Baconlube. Brought to us by J&D’s the makers of such amazingly fine products as Baconsalt, Baconnaise (everybody’s favorite), BaconRanch, Bacon Lip Balm and many many more bacon flavored product…